Time for an update in the world of crazy. Last week was pretty tame, but this week’s action made up for it. Ms. TMI is in rare form and Ms. WIM is back in the relationship cycle of doom. Ready? Here we go!
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On Monday Ms. TMI reported a semi-successful weekend with Mr. STBBD. They had a couples counseling session on Saturday where they discussed finances. She is still pissed about his lack of motivation to get a better job, do things around the house when work falls though, or follow-through on anything in general. She leaves him lists of things to do when she leaves for work, badgers him all day about doing it, and is then pissed when she gets home to find nothing is done. In this telling of his continued incompetence, she called him a redneck idiot that can’t finish a thought to save his life. Sweet, isn’t she? She continued to tell me that she can see herself repeating the failed and dysfunctional marriage of her parents. So when I asked her why she is continuing a relationship with this man, she simply responded, “Because I love him.” REALLY?! You could have fooled me!
On Tuesdays she goes to see her personal therapist (reminder, he specialized in child psychology and she is in her 30s). When she got back to work she had to fill me in on the session. She said that she told the good doctor that she is not controlling her crazy as well as she used to; that she just doesn’t have the energy to keep it under control. The good doctor recommended that she get on meds to help her out (Go Doc!). However, Ms. TMI refuses to take any meds because they may affect her FERTILITY!? Did I mention that this same doctor told her that under no circumstances should she have a baby with this man??
Apparently she has also been spending time in her sessions talking to the good doctor about her 9 year old nephew’s behavioral problems. Well, she calls him her nephew, but I think it’s her ex-stepbrothers stepchild. Whatever. Anyway, this kid is apparently a train wreck. He doesn’t listen, is constantly testing boundaries, defiant, and all around a problem child. He even refuses to use the bathroom at home and instead pisses of the back deck. Recently the problem child’s veteran 3rd grade teacher called his mom to tell her that her son was “the worst child I have ever taught.” Ms. TMI continued to tell me that she is trying to get this child into see her therapist (since he specializes in child behavior); but that he said he couldn’t see him because it would be a conflict of interest. Well, Ms. TMI pushed and pushed on both the mother of the problem child and the doc until they finally agreed to have a phone call to see what steps could be taken. Ms. TMI even said she would stop seeing the doctor if it meant he could see her nephew. In telling me about this kid, she had all kinds of excuses about why he is the way he is, however, her description of his actions boiled down to this: he is charming, feels no remorse for his actions, is volatile, and manipulative. These are common element of a psychopath and no amount of therapy or drugs is going to help this kid. They decided to send him to a 3 week behavioral modification camp over the summer. I guess we will see. Ms. TMI’s next mission is to get her 13 year old nephew in line because is already video chatting naked body parts to girls at his school. Apparently she is a child rearing expert. Sounds like a healthy situation for all involved, no?
On Wednesday and Thursday, Ms. TMI spent the day comparing insurance plans coverage rates on IVF. Her current insurance won’t cover her, specifically at the IVF clinic she has already picked out. I think she has it narrowed down to 2. For each cycle her out of pocked expenses will be about $3000 and she is anticipating 3 rounds to get knocked up. Now she just needs to make sure that the coverage is valid, even if she isn’t married and has preexisting conditions. She also mentioned that she might need to get lap band surgery first, but she will wait and see since she is back on the weight watchers train (yesterday her lunch was 14points in case you were interested).
This morning she was on the anger train with Mr. STBBD bright and early. Apparently they spent all last night fighting over a nudey pic of a girl on his cell phone. When questioned about why he had a naked chick on his cell phone, he responded “I don’t know” and that answer was NOT ok with Ms. TMI. She pushed and pushed for an answer until he snapped which, in turn, made her snap. She claims it wasn’t about the picture, per se, but his inability to “answer a simple question, just have a conversation, give a complete thought, or explain anything on the spot.” I’m not sure how we got from nudey pics to jobs, but I guess he proceeded to tell her that her job is bullshit and that she is lazy at work (has he been here?! LOL). She took great offense and countered by telling him that at least her job required some intelligence but a monkey could do his job. Vilification tennis anyone? This round of the match concluded with him telling her that it “is clear you don’t like me and want to change everything about me.” Turns out this guy is pretty perceptive. Ms. TMI’s solution to all of this is to start going to couples counseling twice a week instead of once. What happened to letting Jesus take the wheel!? I bet this weekend will be a doozie.
On to Ms. Wim. She has been keeping to herself recently. That is until yesterday. Ms. TMI was in my office when Ms. Wim entered because she had to “ask a question.” Uh oh. This is Ms. Wim’s favorite ways to insert herself into any conversation. She will say “I just have a quick question” which you would think is work related but instead ends up with her chatting about her problems for the next half an hour or more. Ms. Wim was requesting our help to become a “bitch.” What? You want to become a bitch!? Ok, it doesn’t take a professional to see what this is all about. She is really trying to ask how to distance herself from the ex that drags her along. As you recall, this guy has been very clear about his intentions with Ms. Wim, but she just can’t let it go. Anyway, this dude has a minor back injury, and since she is an expert in all things injury due to the black cloud that follows her around, he has been contacting her to ask questions, get referrals, and get general emotional and physical support. She just can’t say NO and he is sucking her back under his spell. We both advised her to just stop responding to this douchbag, but she said she just couldn’t do that to him because it would make her feel guilty. Ug. Really she didn’t want any advice at all; she just wanted someone to listen to her tales of woe. Since Ms. TMI was also here, she couldn’t just sit back and ride out the storm. Oh no, not Ms. TMI. She laid into Ms. Wim and gave her a tongue lashing about how she is spineless, lets people walk all over her, has horrible choice in men and friends, and is her own crown of thorns. These are more than likely all accurate, however, Ms. Wim wasn’t looking for life advice. Everything that Ms. TMI served up with quickly dismissed by Ms. Wim blame was placed on everyone else. I literally just went back to work while these 2 discussed the correct way to get and keep boyfriends and good friends. Yes friends, that’s right. What I would have given to record that conversation to play for you all here. Maybe next time.
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I’m sure I am forgetting some gems, but this is already getting long. Until next time.
Cheers
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